Mopey post alert - but at least it's real..!!!
Today has been a struggle....in fact this whole week has...I'm tired...worn down...I can't seem to please my children!! My 7 year old has told me the only things that make him happy are chocolate and i-pads and since I won't give him either right now..I'm the bad cop!! And then there's the guinea pig. Which somehow injured his eye and has needed close to a hundred pounds of vets bills over the last couple of days! Thankfully I think it's improving as Caleb has been devastated with the possibility of loosing his pet! But a hundred pounds, seriously!!! I felt sick handing over my card....but also felt a desperation that this guinea pig needs to make it! The kids have prayed for Rainbow....so we're hopeful he's going to pull through now!
Caleb is having his week of chemo and steroids, so his meltdowns are frequent...wearing and exhausting. To him as well as me. I'm hearing his shriek thinking he's broken a bone to find out he's lost a favourite piece of LEGO! ?!?
I guess I will get use to these weeks and feel more prepared for these weeks the more they come around. The kids have all been poorly this past week, which equals an exhausted mama. These are the moments when I sit down and write. I find it utterly crazy how our emotions can exhaust us...so much!
And then you feel like such a terrible friend as I feel like I'm being sucked of all my energy and there is nothing left for anybody else on days like these. Weeks like these can make you feel quite withdrawn from the rest of the world. Quite useless to rest of the world.
Again, when we reach the end of ourselves I think that's when we can enter that sweet spot of Jesus' Rest! So I'm reminded when I'm here that I need to go spend time with my maker, my creator. Who understands my trials. My weaknesses and the intricacies of why my children are behaving like this.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. " Matthew 11.28